Agree to Disagree and Let Go!

As parents our responsibility is to raise our children to be caring, loving, strong and self-sufficient adults. That is the purpose. We pray, seek guidance from our Bible, pastors, physicians and teachers, to ensure we’re doing the best for their entire well-being. Then the day comes when we must let go. This is the day we’ve prepared for, but also the day we fear most.

How can we protect them if they are not in our view? Oh, I struggle with these moments still. My children are 22, 19 and 8. They are all residents of our home, however, they are adult children. They have jobs and vehicles.

Only yesterday I had another life-course in letting go. My 19-year old purchased a new car in mid-January. My husband and I decided he could drive locally, but we did not want him driving to Raleigh until he had at least three months of driving under his belt. My son honored the request a couple times. Yesterday, he challenged me. He constantly argued that he had driven safety and he wanted me to trust him. I tried explaining this was not a matter of trust, this was a matter of protection. I persisted, telling him he was not ready.

My son equally persisted. Finally, I let go. Unfortunately, my children have always challenged us, asked a reason why before obeying. I honestly don’t know where they get this quality from. Of course, in a heartbeat, my husband would say, YOU! They get that from YOU!

Anyway, after letting go of battling with my son, I spoke to my husband. I asked, “Are you ok with this?” He said, “Yes. We have to allow him to do this.” 

OK, I’m still not sure about that. Did I have to allow him? Yes, I have rode in the car with my son. He handles his new car well, but still I believed he needed more time — more experience. 

This morning I’m thankful to report Chris made it home safe and sound, and before curfew, I might add. Smiling big, the first thing he said when he returned was, “See Mom, you doubted me.” I replied, “No, this was not about trust, this was about my protection.”

I guess I will always offer words of guidance and protection to our children. That will never cease.  God never stops speaking to us through His word, or within our hearts. He warns us. His job as our heavenly Father is to protect us. 

There comes a point when God will let us go. There are times we may make the wrong decision. In His grace and mercy, He provides protection. That’s what I had to seek in order to find peace while Chris drove yesterday. I prayed, we had dinner, and my 8-year old and I watched The Flash on Netflix.

Yesterday, I learned sometimes the only and best protection I can provide for my children is prayer. God will handle all the rest. Thank you Father.

How about you? Can you share a parenting moment when you had to agree to disagree and let go?

Until We Meet Again,

Brook Lynn

Brook Lynn Dorcent
Author/Coach/Inspirational Speaker

Host: JUST WRITE REVIEW
Founder/Facilitator: JUST WRITE! - A Club for Writers
Missing the Mark (Novel One)
Pressing Toward the Mark (Novel Two)
Forgetting Betrayal (Novel Three)
Above All (Novel Four)
His Wedding Vow (A Novel) Coming 2016
Spirit Over Will (Devotional)

OUTStanding (Memoir/Teen Guide)
www.brooklynndorcent.com
Why Not...Read for Love

Seeing The Value In It All

I made a commitment to blog every Sunday. Until Friday, I had nothing. I was slightly concerned that I wouldn’t have anything of value to share. Still, I believed I would find something to blog about. It’s amazing when you make a commitment to the gifts God has given us; He will ensure that we have all we need.

On Friday, He allowed me to bump into wisdom and I saw the value in it all.

I leave work at 5:00 pm. It was around 4:20 and it had not been a very eventful day. For that, I was grateful. On my way to my office after catching up on some filing, I saw a retired employee and his spouse. We normally see this retiree every Friday. He’s a stamp collector and comes to acquire all the stamps we’ve received. As the years have progressed, he moves a little slower with the help of a cane. Nevertheless, he’s faithful.

Seeing me in the hall, he politely introduced me to his wife. I remembered her from his retirement party. Then, she shared such admirable sentiments about her husband. Her words moved her to the point of tears. The memory stayed with me. I believe no one knows us like our spouses do. They’ve truly seen, the good, the bad, and the ugly. Yet, a faithful spouse still sees the value in us.

His wife said, “Oh, I’m sorry, I don’t remember you.” It had been at least 12 years since that retirement party. I replied, “That is fine.” I also shared why she was so memorable to me.

Well…that sparked a conversation between the two of us. As we went on and on, her husband walked off in search of his stamps. She talked, and I mainly listened. She shared they had been married 56 years. She talked about his current health challenges, but it was not his problem alone. Oh no, they were a team, in it together, and would get through it.

She not only shared about how much she cared about her spouse, she shared how she had neglected her own health and urged me not to do that. Years ago, although she felt fine, medical testing revealed a problem with her heart. Well since she had no symptoms, she went about her daily routine, going to a ball game, grocery shopping, preparing dinner, and cleaning the kitchen. She gently touched my arm as she emphasized, “You know us women, we never stop.”

That night, life for her almost came to an abrupt end. After her routine, she began to feel like she was going under. Since the doctor had given her Nitroglycerin, she managed to gather enough strength to find her purse and take one. It had been too late, however. She struggled into a room where her husband sat at the computer and plopped into a chair. Her last words before her eyes rolled out of sight were, “I feel awful.”

Later, she found herself being prepped for open-heart surgery.

As I listened, I thought about my health. I come from a family where my mother and grandmother both have had heart attacks.  For no reason at all, I stopped taking my daily aspirin.

Shifting my thoughts, I focused on her again. We could have talked for hours more. She spoke of family and said, “God has a plan. We don’t know the time or day. However, I’d love to see what would become of my youngest grandchild.”

That is a hope we both share. I don’t have grandchildren yet, but what a joy that would be! When she left me, I felt refreshed.

Just as her husband’s pastime is collecting stamps, mine is writing. No matter how many books I sell, my heart’s desire is to just write. I also saw the value in appreciating my spouse and family all the more. The best way to do all those things; is to value my health. On my way home that evening, I ran into the pharmacy and purchased my aspirin. I’m taking them again.

I was grateful I bumped into wisdom on Friday. How about you?  Please share your unexpected encounters and the value in it all. I’d love to hear from you.

Until We Meet Again,

Brook Lynn

Brook Lynn Dorcent

Author/Coach/Inspirational Speaker

Founder/Facilitator: JUST WRITE! - A Club for Writers
HOST: THE JUST WRITE REVIEW (YouTube)

Missing the Mark (Novel One)

Pressing Toward the Mark (Novel Two)

Forgetting Betrayal (Novel Three)

Above All (Novel Four)

His Wedding Vow (A Novel) Coming Soon

Spirit Over Will (Devotional)

OUTStanding (Memoir/Teen Guide)

www.brooklynndorcent.com

Why Not...Read for Love

It’s going to take a long time… Sow W.H.A.T.?

Years ago a friend suggested I write a book. Offended, I replied, “Do you know how long it will take to write a book?” The words flew from my mouth before I had time to give it reasonable consideration. I couldn’t believe he had suggested such a thing. I mean, really, who has the time?

Oh, the lessons I’ve learned over the years about this wonderful gift called time. Many of us defer our dreams based on the length of time; as if the validity of the manifestation does not matter because of the time it will take to produce. I know many of us are busy and do not feel we have sufficient time to sow into our dreams, wants and desires.  I’m writing this today so you will allow yourself a chance to pull back and readjust your vision lens.

I was able to do this when I moved from New York to North Carolina. My friend knew I had great stories to tell.  And after I moved, my life slowed down, and the writing bug bit. I began to value the time I had. However, manifestation of the vision requires more than valuing time. It requires active sowing.

I will share some life lessons to explain what I mean.

I met my husband while in my second semester of college. We fell head over heals in love. Against my parent’s better judgment, we married in my senior year. They were afraid I’d get pregnant and that might interfere with graduation. They were right! Seven months later I was pregnant and I put school on hold. Three years later, I had my second child. Finally, I decided I needed to return to earn those last 30 credits toward my bachelors’ degree. Returning with two young children was very challenging. Nevertheless, I completed the course. Looking back, it took ten years for me to earn my four-year degree. Sow…W.H.A.T.?

Here’s another life lesson…

My mother hit a very rough patch in her life when I turned 10 years old. She began drinking heavily and physically abused my sister and I. This went on for six years. Year in and year out, I prayed. As the years passed, things progressively worsened. My prayers did not fall upon deaf ears. In fact, I prayed for my mom to stop drinking, God did one better. He delivered her from drinking. After attending one year of AA meetings, she stopped going. My family panicked, thinking this was not good for a recovering alcoholic. Her words, “I just don’t want it anymore.” She never took another drink. It took a long time for that prayer to be answered, Sow…W.H.A.T.?

My point, God has given us the principle of seedtime and harvest. This is how production is manifested in the earth. Somehow, we’ve become microwave producers. If it’s going to take a long time, we respectfully decline the benefit. However, if we are to receive the benefit from the investment of time, then what should we sow?

W – Workable plan. Whatever you are working toward requires a workable plan.

H – Hold onto hope. The enemy will challenge you. Please know; with God all things are possible.

A – Acknowledgment. If you need direction, seek the Father. He will guide you.

T- Talk it up. Confess and call those things that be not, as though they were.

The next time a seed is planted into your heart that will take some time manifesting, reply with, Sow W.H.A.T. and get to work.

Bountiful blessings awaits.

Until we meet again,

Brook Lynn Dorcent

Author/Coach/Inspirational Speaker

Founder/Facilitator: JUST WRITE! - A Club for Writers

Missing the Mark (Novel One)

Pressing Toward the Mark (Novel Two)

Forgetting Betrayal (Novel Three)

Above All (Novel Four)

His Wedding Vow (A Novel) Coming Soon

Spirit Over Will (Devotional)

OUTStanding (Teen Guide)

www.brooklynndorcent.com

Why Not...Read for Love

Mom Said, Take It!

Mom At Easter Dinner 1976

Moving forward while facing opposition is not easy. I know. After seven years of marriage, my husband and I separated. I was feeling badly and looking worse than I felt. My mom was living at the time. She said, “Girl, pick yourself up, go get your hair done, and we’re going shopping!”

Mom didn’t have very much money. She gave me what she had to improve my appearance. Not only that, she and my sister would force me to come out of my emotional depression. They’d say, “Today, we’re watching this movie, or today we’re going here.”

They didn’t let me wallow. I don’t know if they were aware of what their actions were truly portraying. At that time I wasn’t aware. However, their actions declared this; God has given you goodness, take it, look like it, and act like it.

Initially, I didn’t want to move forward. I wanted to curl into a ball, sit in the shower and let the water drown me. Some days, that is exactly what I did. I couldn’t see the vision of joy and happiness God had for me.

God not only gave me my family to help me through the roadblock, He sent great friends, along with Dr. Charles Stanley and Kirk Franklin. OK, no, Dr. Stanley and Mr. Franklin didn’t come to visit me. Their ministry did, however. They touched my life in ways I cannot adequately articulate. Their words pushed me, motivated to take what God had planned for me.

Sixteen years later, I am happily married to the same man that once separated from me -- the joy in our hearts and home overflows. We need more than one cup…

Although God has a plan for us, we still have a responsibility to partake. We have to take what has been laid out for us. For many of us who have started our businesses and ministries, we started out with a force of strength and passion. On cloud nine to the ninth power, nothing could stop us. Later along the way, roadblocks, opposition and heartache appeared. It can be very easy to slip into a comfortable stance and say, I’ll sit here, I will not move forward.

Whatever you are facing now, you must lift up your head and know you can get through this, prosperity and peace belongs to you. And although, you have faced a roadblock, God has positioned people in your life that will help you through it.

Don’t wallow, get up and take it!

Until we meet again,

Brook Lynn

Brook Lynn Dorcent
Author/Coach/Inspirational Speaker
Founder/Facilitator: JUST WRITE! - A Club for Writers

Host: THE JUST WRITE REVIEW
Missing the Mark (Novel One)
Pressing Toward the Mark (Novel Two)
Forgetting Betrayal (Novel Three)
Above All (Novel Four)
His Wedding Vow (A Novella) Coming Soon
Spirit Over Will (Devotional)

OUTStanding (Teen Guide)
www.brooklynndorcent.com
Why Not...Read for Love

We Know Too Much!

Recently, I had the pleasure of recording our February episode of THE JUST WRITE REVIEW! It was truly amazing. Our guest author, Dr. Calvin Ellison shared his new book with us, Beyond Your Comfort Zones. I was first introduced to the book with a request to endorse it. After reading the book treatment, I was convinced the book was written solely for me. It is a very scary thing to step out of our comfort zones. Yet, for the past year, I continually hear that is exactly what I am to do.

I have to ask myself what is truly holding me back. The answer, I’m afraid of exposure. This is really hard for me to admit to myself. For one, I pray for exposure. I pray that my books will be read globally. I pray for doors to open to share my ministry. But then, when someone says you ought to apply for greater exposure, I clam up.

Second question for myself, why am I afraid of exposure? The answer, people will look at me and see; truly there is nothing special about me. Really, I am just a girl from Brooklyn. That’s what I know.

Dr. Ellison helped me yesterday. He said, we know too much! Wow! Immediately my mind went to Adam and Eve. They were not allowed to eat from the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil. I always questioned that. To me, knowledge is power. The more we know, the further we go. That’s what we hear.

As we continued our interview, Dr. Ellison said, moving out of our comfort zone requires us to be naked. The covers have to come off. The light went off for me. I’m getting it now. This move is going to require real faith. I can’t rely on what I know. In fact, what I know isn’t helpful. God doesn’t need my knowledge to accomplish His will. He does require my obedience.

I know myself in this now present moment. God knows me in my tomorrow. If I forget what I know, transform my mind and obtain God’s mind, I will be the vessel He’s designed me to be.

I’d be lying if I said; I’m completely ready for this move. The truth is; I’ll never be ready. I am, however, going to be obedient.  Here we go!

My question to you today…

Will you forget what you know, be obedient and move beyond your comfort zone?

Visit Amazon to obtain Dr. Calvin Ellison’s book, Beyond Your Comfort Zones

To view the Dr. Ellison’s interview airing February 20 visit my YouTube Channel (THE JUST WRITE REVIEW)

Until we meet again…

Brook Lynn

Brook Lynn Dorcent

Author/Coach/Inspirational Speaker

Founder/Facilitator: JUST WRITE! - A Club for Writers

Host: THE JUST WRITE REVIEW

Missing the Mark (Novel One)

Pressing Toward the Mark (Novel Two)

Forgetting Betrayal (Novel Three)

Above All (Novel Four)

His Wedding Vow (A Novella) Coming Soon

Spirit Over Will (Devotional)

OUTStanding (Teen Guide)

www.brooklynndorcent.com